Corrupted Soul
by Midnight Scarlet
Summary: *Dark Fic, OOC Sakura* What happens when you think you know someone but you don't? Sakura talks about her TRUE self. *warning: Death Fic*


Disclaimer: I don't own Cardcaptor Sakura or it's characters! I only own the plot of this story, "Corrupted Soul"! Now go read my fanfiction!  
  
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~* Go now, if you want it  
An otherworld awaits you  
Don't you give up on it  
You bite the hand that feeds you*~  
  
They think they know me.  
  
They don't.  
  
If they knew the real me, they would walk away, leave me here to rot by myself. No, if they knew who I really was, they would have killed me long ago.  
  
You think you know who I am?  
  
You don't.  
  
Everyone thinks they know Sakura Kimono. You ask someone who she is, they'll tell you:  
  
"Oh she's that sweet girl, the one who is always smiling. You know her, she's willing to help everyone with their problems and never thinks of herself first."  
  
Huh, you'd think I was some kind of angel!  
  
But I'm not. No, I'm anything but an angel. If they only knew what I had done...they would have locked me up in a mental hospital.  
  
Poor Tomoyo. She was the unfortunate one to find out who I really was.  
  
Flashback  
  
"No.Sakura, why? How could you DO such a thing?!"  
  
"I'm sorry Tomoyo. So sorry. You weren't meant to find out. Please forgive me for what I'm going to do my dear friend."  
  
"SAKURA!"  
  
End Flashback  
  
I blacked out after that scream. I didn't even realize she was dead until I saw her blood all over my hands.  
  
And I felt cold. So cold that it hurt.  
  
Please forgive me Tomoyo, my angel. I never wanted to kill you but I couldn't let you live. Not after what you knew.  
  
~*All alone, cold fields you wander  
  
Memories of it, cloud your sight  
  
Fills your dreams, disturbs your slumber  
  
Lost your way, a fallen knight*~  
  
My guardians don't even know the real me and all the things I've done. They see me as everyone else sees me.  
  
Kind and caring.  
  
My god, sometimes I just want to yell at them, scream that they're all idiots! How do they not notice? How do they not know?!  
  
Kero could probably look into my mind. I know he can even if he won't admit it. He trusts me too much and that can be fatal to all of us.  
  
Gullible Kero-Chan, how you amuse me!  
  
Do you really believe that there's good in everyone? My, my how Clow Reid has taught you. It will be your undoing my friend.  
  
Yes, my weak pathetic little friend.  
  
Then there's Yue. He's a little more careful about people. A little smarter about the real world.  
  
A little more cautious about me.  
  
When it was the Final Judgement, he sensed there was some kind of energy coming from me. Dark energy.  
  
He would have killed me had I not prevailed and won, giving him my little: "I want to be your friend not your master" speech.  
  
Since then he's been as blind as Kero has. He thinks I'm a good person. If only he knew what I did...he would kill me himself.  
  
~*Hold on now, aim is steady  
An otherworld awaits you  
One thousand years, are you ready?  
The otherworld, it takes you*~  
  
Ah, Li. You always loved me haven't you? You don't see past my face and my false actions. You think you know me better then everyone don't you?  
  
Poor stupid boy.  
  
You don't know me any better then the rest of them. You're just living in a dream world, only seeing what you want to see.  
  
You're just love sick, following me around like a puppy dog, wagging your tail.  
  
It's pathetic really.  
  
I think back to Meiling. Maybe it would have been better if you had stayed with her. She loved you for *real*, not like I love you.  
  
Hell, I don't even love you. I don't think I ever really did. It was more of a crush then anything else.  
  
No, I've always loved someone else. But they've never loved me back.  
  
~*Go into the sand, and the dusk and the sky  
Go now, there's no better plan, then to do or die  
Free me, pray to the faith in the face of the light  
Feed me, fill me with sin and get ready to fight*~  
  
Yuki. My one true love.  
  
I've always had feelings for you; I've always loved you. But you never loved me back did you?  
  
No, you had to go to my own *brother* for love!  
  
Oh Touya, how I envied you! You had his love, the one thing I had craved to have since I had met him.  
  
How I hated you for that.  
  
And that's when I made the decision that changed everything.  
  
Flashback  
  
"Sakura, what are you doing?!"  
  
"You knew all along Touya! You knew my real feelings for Yuki you knew how much I loved him! But you had to take it all away from me, didn't you?"  
  
"Please Sakura, stop this. You don't know what you're doing!"  
  
"Oh I know what I'm doing brother. I should have done it a long time ago."  
  
And the knife went down.  
  
End Flashback  
  
I killed my brother. My own flesh and blood. And you know what?  
  
I enjoyed every second of it.  
  
I know this makes me a bad person. Hell, it makes me a horrible one!  
  
But if I was given another chance to go back in time, I would have done the same thing.  
  
~*You know you will  
  
You know you will  
  
You know it, you know it, you know it, you know it, that you will  
  
You know it, you know it, you know it, you know it, that you will  
  
You know you will...*~  
  
Oh Yuki! You don't know that I killed your lover, your soul mate.  
  
You think I'm too innocent to even consider doing such a thing. What a delusional creature you are!  
  
If you knew it was me who killed Touya, you'd never speak to me again. I can't let that happen now can I?  
  
I saw you yesterday at the cemetery, standing in front of my brother's grave. You where crying, your beautiful face filled with pain and sorrow.  
  
I hid behind a tombstone so you never saw me. I listened to your every word.  
  
You told him how much you missed him, longed to see his face again, *loved* him. You told him no one could ever take his place.  
  
I guess it hurt me more then I care to admit.  
  
I started crying, that bitter feeling of rage coming over me. I heard a voice in my head, repeating the same thing over and over again:  
  
He must pay for making you suffer.  
  
So I took a rock, came up behind you and cracked your head open. Your blood poured everywhere, staining the grass and everything else it touched.  
  
Before you died, I heard you whisper:  
  
"Why Sakura? Why?"  
  
Then it was over.  
  
~*Fight, fight, fight  
  
Fight, fight, fight  
  
Fight, fight, fight  
  
Fight, fight, fight!*~  
  
Now I stand here in my house.  
  
Empty silence fills my ears. How I loathe it!  
  
I'm sorry that Yuki had to die. I shouldn't have killed him. But if he couldn't love me, then no one else could have him!  
  
He deserved everything he got.  
  
I know what I have to do now. I've done too much wrong to live anymore.  
  
I've killed my best friend for finding out what I had done to my brother.  
  
I killed my love because he loved Touya and not me.  
  
So now, I know what I have to do.  
  
I walk to the kitchen. There on the counter is a big knife. I grab it in my hand, my finger tracing the sharp edge.  
  
A little blood comes out. I gasp and put my finger in my mouth. My blood tastes metallic, reminding me of all the people I have killed with my own two hands.  
  
I grab the knife with my right hand and slide it over my wrist, first slowly then I dig deeper into the skin.  
  
So this is how my life ends.  
  
~*Hope dies and you wander  
  
The otherworld, it makes you  
  
Dreams, they rip asunder  
  
The otherworld, it hates you*~  
  
As I slowly start to lose conciseness, my thoughts travel to all of my friends.  
  
Li, Meiling, Kero, Yue, Eriol...  
  
They will all be better off without me.  
  
They will live their lives, without me happily. I can do no more damage.  
  
Though I wish...I had killed them all.  
  
A chuckle escapes my lips, then slowly a full rumbling laugh. I sink to the floor, sprawling out all over the place.  
  
Be careful about who you think you know. Because they could be something you don't think they are.  
  
They just might have a corrupted soul.  
  
Then the darkness sets in and I feel no more.  
  
And for the first time in my life...I am truly, honestly glad.  
  
~*Free now, ride up on it  
  
Up to the heights, it takes you  
  
Go now, if you want it  
  
An otherworld awaits you*~  
  
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Everyone: O.O  
  
YMS: You know hikari that was pretty good.  
  
Mid-S: You think so? ^__^  
  
YMS: Yeah, it might be the best thing you've written in your life.  
  
Mid-S: Um, thanks? O.o  
  
YMS: No problem! ^_^  
  
Mid-S: So what did you guys think? I liked it myself but what about you? Read and review please!  
  
JA! 


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